I Don't Wanna Grow Up

Being a grown up, for lack of a better word, sucks. I hate it. Sure, like most anything there are pros that go along with the cons. You can make all the decisions for life, but after a while, that just becomes tedious. Yes, when you are in your early twenties, the freedoms of your social life and how you wish to live can be exhilarating. But as you get older, you compromise or outright sacrifice them for the responsibilities of being an adult. Getting a job to pay for food, shelter, transportation, clothing and all the little things you find you need each day. When you are younger, you tend to worry about these things less, if at all. Now, make sure you take a list with you shopping so you do not forget all the household items you need. And do not be gone long, there are tons of chores to do and you need to get to bed early so you are not late or tired for work the next day. Bah, I say.

I am tired of being an adult. I hate all the nonsense that goes along with it. How did things get so complicated? It seems anymore even the simplest of ideas requires intense planning and forethought. And if you have some major idea for your life, say a job change, move, purchasing a house, planning a wedding or starting a family, forget it. You could find yourself up to your ears in plans, advice and paperwork. I mean, if you own a home, do you know the paperwork and money involved just to get the permits required to make significant changes to your home? Let alone what you need to actually do the work itself. How did things get like this?

I look at things and I wonder, how did we turn our world into these pointless exercises in chasing meaningless goals and goods? When did we get away from reveling in the beauty all around us, and the joy of just living life? When did it become about money, power, fame, riches?

I cannot answer a single one of these questions. I have pondered them all, and have no idea. I am sure it is like most things. The changes came slowly, glacially even. Little things here and there until we were mired in the quagmire of modern life too concerned with money, status, power and consumer goods to really focus on the important things. To be able to look at the world in a carefree way and enjoy what it has to offer and each other.

Well, you know what? Forget it; I do not care to figure it out. I want out; I do not want it anymore. I do not want to worry about money or bills, sending myself into stress induced sickness and premature death. I do not want to compete for biggest spoils, just to say I have the most of everything. I do not want to conquer the world for something to do. I do not want the trappings of being an adult anymore.

I want to play in a stream all day until I am pruny and waterlogged. I want to run up and down hills until my lungs are burning, with my only concern being that the setting sun will end my fun. I want to play games with friends and have sleepovers. I want to make up games with friends. I want to sit by campfires and sing songs while making s’mores. I want to hold hands and walk by a babbling brook, with the sun shining and breezes blowing. I want to sit in a field and stare at the sky, trying to figure out what the clouds look like today. I want to marvel at the wonders of nature, even if it is merely ants scurrying to find food for their queen. I want to enjoy life.

Enough of that, I guess. Now please excuse me, I need to get back to work.