The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 17

Wow, the end of the regular season. How did we get here? I cannot believe in a mere 12 hours, the magical ride that is the NFL season will be over. Of course, for Rams fans, that could not come soon enough. After today, 20 NFL teams will fold their tents, never to be heard from significantly until August. Savor each moment, because in one month, the cold reality of the off season will strike us all.

Opening Kickoff

Now do you believe me that the NFL loves having as many teams as possible in contention? It should be obvious since the Dolphins and Jaguars have been in the post season conversation all week. Even though for either team to make the playoffs it would take a scenario as unlikely as OJ escaping prison to bring the “real killers” to justice on the Today Show as he reveals his cure for cancer.

The Way It Was

Bungles and Patriots clinched their divisions, and now are in a fight for the top remaining seeds in the AFC. How can I keep them both interested…?

Dolphins certainly showed their mettle. Oh no wait, they did not.

Colts rolled over and played dead, and by the look on Peyton’s face, that was not his first choice.

Saints shat the bed against Tampa Bay. Now, tell me again who exactly does not think special teams are important and crucial?

Oddly enough, they clinched the top seed in the NFC despite losing. That will prompt a gift basket to Vikings headquarters.

Look, there’s another one already there. What does the card read? “Dear Brett and Brad, thanks to you two sewing seeds of dysfunction, even your defense looks poor now. It made me look like the winner others believe I am! Have a great 2010! Big hugs, Jay Cutler”

Hey, good on the Packers! They destroyed the Seahawks and clinched a playoff spot. Boy, Aaron Rodgers sure is good in December, no?

Could the Giants, in their last game in their own stadium, possibly have played worse?

Steve Smith broke his arm catching a touchdown, season over. Well, not like the Panthers were gunning for Super Bowl at this point anyway.

Wow, go on with your bad self Matt Moore. I seem to remember me touting this young man a few seasons ago, with no one listening then…

The Steel Pit

I’ll give the team this much, that was a darn good win and an excellent way to close out the home season. If for no other reasons, it gave the home town fans one last victory in person and kept miniscule playoff hopes alive.

And even better, for once the defense gave up a total of 0 points in the 4^th quarter. Sure, they gave up the lead in the 3^rd, but once Big Ben took it back, they did not relinquish it again.

Now, I know what you’re going to say, and I totally agree. The Ravens inexplicable self destruction certainly did help tremendously. I could not agree with you more. But if you play undisciplined football, you must suffer the consequences. Something some Ravens have had trouble swallowing this week. But cry me a river. Play a better game; you’d already be in the playoffs. Steeler fans know that all to well this season.

By the way, a big thank you goes out to Derrick Mason for dropping a sure touchdown. I think a gift basket should be headed his way.

In other positive news, Ben Roethlisberger was named the team’s MVP for the season. That’s a big obvious call in my opinion. Well, so should a Pro Bowl nod for Big Ben, but hey who ever paid attention to the obvious.

Regardless, I’d venture the argument Ben is the least valuable player. Oh, not because he’s bad. But because when he’s in the game, too many other players seem to get lazy and this mind set that if they screw up, Big Ben will bail them out. Unfortunately, that has been the case far too often this season. Perhaps Ben should run a seminar in some mini camps about bringing your A game every week.

Ok, now on to the sad reality. For Pittsburgh to make the playoffs, they need the Texans and Jets to lose. Which means the team and fans must root for the Patriots and Bungles, respectively, to win. Talk about a revolting development. And considering developments around the league, one or both of those teams may just sit their starters and let the chips fall where they may, which would be disastrous for Pittsburgh’s slim playoff hopes. Personally, I’m going with the same attitude I had last week. I expect nothing and figure after today, my boys will be headed for the front 9. But as long as there is some slim hope, I’ll be there. But we shall see.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Wait, Bill Cowher may coach in 2010? Combined with all the talk about Shanahan and Gruden, the Coaching Carousel will start with a bang next week.

It would seem that Reggie Bush’s questionable dealings with an agent have yet to go away. Funny is it not how this has lasted longer than his relationship with Kim Kardashian.

These are halcyon days to be a Chiefs fan, I tell you what.

Wait, the Redskins interviewed a current assistant for current head coach Jim Zorn’s job? Wow, Dan Snyder is no longer being subtle about Zorn’s future. Well, after publically emasculating Zorn, like he was anyway.

When it comes to NFL conspiracies, this may be one of the dumbest I’ve ever heard. LaMarr, it’s time to grow up. You guys put yourself in this position, not the Patriots or Bungles.

Upon Further Review

Only in the NFL will you have a team that finishes week 16 at 14-1, and roundly booed at home by their own fans. Sounds absurd right? You know teams like Detroit or St. Louis would fall all over themselves if they had a chance where they might be 14-1 no? Their fans would lose their minds if told their team would be 14-1, and would call others idiots for booing such a team. And yet, that’s what we had last week in Indianapolis.

The Colts, and their green head coach, pulled Peyton Manning and other key starters late in the 3^rd quarter last week. The Colts second string promptly gave up the lead and eventually the game to the desperate Jets. The Colts faithful were livid at the team for giving up on 16-0, booing the team loudly for the remainder of the game. Normally, I’d call them spoiled and entitled fans that really do not remember how awful the team once was. But in this case, I agree.

Now, I know the correct thing to say would be, no our focus is not on going undefeated but merely to win the championship. Every team that goes deep into the season without a loss says the same thing. But you know players would love to put such an indelible stamp on the NFL history books. Peyton Manning said the previous week that an undefeated season is not their goal, none of the players talk about such things and that they would follow Coach Caldwell’s lead without question or gripe. Yet did you see him in the 4^th quarter of the Jets game? He paced the sidelines, with helmet still on and agonizing look stitched on his face, like a caged lion desperate to be let loose. Was that the behavior of a man who truly cares less about winning every game? I think not.

And let’s just take a look at recent history to see if this action plan of resting players really works.

In 2008, eventual champion Pittsburgh played their starters in the last game of the season, to the consternation of most and almost decapitation of Ben Roethlisberger. Despite no extra rest, although they did have a bye week in the playoffs, the team went on to win it all.

In 2007, eventual champion New York played a fierce regular season finale against New England to try and stop the Patriots march to 16-0. While the Giants failed in that game, their play and experience gained from playing New York hard to the end has been stated as a key to their victory over New England in the Super Bowl. The Colts rested starters this year and fell in the playoffs to San Diego.

In 2005 eventual champion Pittsburgh played their starters through the last game, mostly because of their need to do so just to make the playoffs. But the experience of playing each week as though it were the playoffs hardened a team that went on an unprecedented run through the playoffs and became a very unlikely Super Bowl champion. The Colts, much like this year, sat starters early and most did not play a meaningful game, or minutes for almost a month. In their first significant game, they were defeated in the divisional round by, the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Regardless of whether extra rest will keep starters fresh or the team more focused, it does not matter. All that matters now for Caldwell is he must guide his team to a Super Bowl victory. At this point, nothing else will suffice. Otherwise, this plan just turns the 2009 campaign into yet another wasted season and another overly cautious move of resting starters for weeks before a meaningful game only to see them play questionably when it matters most. And we’ve all seen this script played out before, and unfortunately so have Colts fans.

He Said He Said

"It’s going to be an exciting Sunday to figure out what happens with all the scenarios." - Steelers receiver Hines Ward

Exciting is hardly the word I would use.

"We’re not dead yet. We still got a pulse in this thing, and we’ll continue to control the things that we can control." – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin

I hate to point out the obvious, but you could have done that in the Chiefs game, or Raiders, or Browns….

“Missed opportunities is the moral of this story.'' Ravens defensive back Dominique Foxworth

For you and me both my man.

''I think that call was very late. It didn't seem like if affected the play.'' – Ravens head coach Jim Harbaugh on the holding call that wiped out a McGahee touchdown run

Well, it did, so quit your whining butt bag.

"There was no chance I'd drop it. I'd die before I'd drop that ball. Then I fell into the end zone, and when I got up, I knew it was broken.'' – Panthers receiver Steve Smith on breaking his arm and then scoring a touchdown

And that’s why it takes a special person to play in the NFL. Dumb? Maybe, but definitely special.

"I disagree with their whole scheme ... They don't let me rush. They're all against me, or whatever.'' – Redskins defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth

Meow meow meow, I make tons of money but I bitch because I signed for wicked millions with a team with poor coaching, questionable ownership and an deteriorating chain of command. Meow meow meow. Enjoy the off season you unstable ass.

"It sort of felt like 'Planes, Trains and Automobiles.'' NFL referee Bill Leavy on getting caught in weather, diverted by plane and caught in traffic trying to get to Baltimore to officiate the game.

Was John Candy there? Were you going the wrong way? Sorry, I love that movie and just had to ask.

“There's no denying it now. Rivers is playing the best football of any quarterback drafted in the past six years”. – SI.com’s Peter King

Oh yeah Peter? Let me ask you two quick questions. One, has Rivers thrown, at all or recently, for over 500 yards in a game? And two, exactly how many Super Bowls has he won? Now, answer those questions and ask me if you would like to rephrase your BS statement.

“I think the NFL is going to have to ask questions to the Competition Committee, and soon, about whether it's smart to ask fans to pay real money if teams are going to treat late-season games like exhibition games.” – SI.com’s Peter King

Now, that I will agree with whole heartedly.

Idiot of the week

I think this week it’s pretty obvious, the idiot is Colts rookie head coach Jim Caldwell.

Look, Caldwell was playing it safe in his first year in charge, with a potent team poised to go far into the playoffs. Yes, that makes sense. You want to have your best horses at their top strength ready for the playoffs. Every team poised to make a Super Bowl run wants that. And you certainly do not want to expose said horses to unnecessary risk by having them play in a meaningless game. I mean, look at Pittsburgh last year, they almost got Roethlisberger killed last year in the season finale and look how that turned out. Oh wait, that’s a bad example.

However, when you screw up a potential undefeated season with a rookie backup who was ridiculously underprepared to take the field, cheese off the paying home town fans and basically turn the good will from the media built up over the course of a very impressive season into a week’s worth of scathing commentary and second guessing with one fell swoop, well, that means only one thing in my book. Jim Caldwell, you are an idiot, and welcome to the fickle world of the NFL.

On Tap This Week

Everyone in the top 5 in my pool picked the exact same teams, except one, who is now tied with the lady K for 1^st thanks to picking Chicago over Minnesota. That doesn’t mean I had a bad week.

Last week: 11-5

Season to date: 166-73

The Lady K is tied for first, I’m tied for 4^th, there’s 5 people 3 points apart for the top 4 spots with one week to go. Now I have to figure out who has what left to play for, and how they might perform, who is just mailing it in until they can go golfing, who is mailing it in until the playoffs, who wants to rest starters, take a week off, and who wants to win, just to win. It’s too much, there’s too much on the line, and damn it, I want that Wii!

Relax, breathe, and let it go. All good things will come with patience and a clear mind. Now, all I need is one or two teams to show they have a damn bit of moxie….

Sunday

Indianapolis (14-1) at Buffalo (5-10)

Let’s see, the Indianapolis backups or a team that admittedly kicked a field goal just to avoid a shut out. Hmmmm….

Colts over Bills

New England (10-5) at Houston (8-7)

Yeah, like Belichick likes to lose games period. I’m sorry, but I have trouble going against Belichick because you know he likes to stick it to everyone. And he wouldn’t want to go into the playoffs on a loss. Although Schaub to Johnson may cause some issues.

Patriots over Texans

New York Giants (8-7) at Minnesota (11-4)

How can I feel good about a New York team that basically rolled over for a injury decimated Carolina team, at home, and said thank you sir may I have another? Of course, how can you feel good about a Minnesota team that melted down with a chance for the number one seed, and now risk not even having a bye week?

Vikings over Giants

San Francisco (7-8) at St. Louis (1-14)

Mike Singletary gets a non losing season, and his turnaround continues.

49ers over Rams

Atlanta (8-7) at Tampa Bay (3-12)

Atlanta finally gets two winning seasons in a row, the first time in the team’s history.

Falcons over Buccaneers

Pittsburgh (8-7) at Miami (7-8)

Yes, all is on the line. I know my boys can come through. For once.

Steelers over Dolphins

Chicago (6-9) at Detroit (2-13)

Oooh, Cutler has two good games in a row, and Bear fans will lose their mind about what that means for 2010. Forgetting the 10 other holes in the offense and defense. Regardless, 2009 ends well.

Bears over Lions

New Orleans (13-2) at Carolina (7-8)

Carolina will be without Steve Smith. And I just cannot imagine that Sean Payton will allow New Orleans to go into the post season on a 3 game losing streak.

Saints over Panthers

Jacksonville (7-8) at Cleveland (4-11)

I trust Jacksonville in the cold a tiny bit less than Cleveland. Either is crappy if you ask me.

Browns over Jaguars

Philadelphia (11-4) at Dallas (10-5)

We saw what the Eagles did to Dallas last year when all Dallas had to do was win and they were in, right? Well this year, Philadelphia has a shot at a bye week. I wonder who might win…

Eagles over Cowboys

Tennessee (7-8) at Seattle (5-10)

Seattle’s horrid season comes to a terrible close.

Titans over Seahawks

Washington (4-11) at San Diego (12-3)

Jim Zorn’s public embarrassment comes to a whimpering end. And Norv Turner looks like a bigger genius. Frightening.

Chargers over Redskins

Green Bay (10-5) at Arizona (10-5)

Arizona has screwed me so many times this season I’m not going with them today. This means they’ll just screw me again. Oh well, let’s call it one last time for the road.

Packers over Cardinals

Kansas City (3-12) at Denver (8-7)

Brandon Marshall has been benched for the game due to a bad hamstring. Wow, that’s a pretty pathetic excuse. If you’re a star player, and your team is playing it’s most important game of the season, and you’re bitching so much about your leg hurting they bench you? Hey Brandon, in last year’s Super Bowl Hines Ward’s leg was practically falling off and he played. I guess it is all about you. Good luck with a new contract somewhere else next year.

Broncos over Chiefs

Baltimore (8-7) at Oakland (5-10)

Yeah, I’d like to see Oakland win, but I’d also like to see a money tree sprout in my back yard. Some things probably won’t happen, especially when Charlie Frye could be prominently involved.

Ravens over Raiders

Cincinnati (10-5) at New York Jets (8-7)

I know, by the time we get to this game Cincinnati could have nothing to play for and lay down against the Jets, rolling out the red carpet for New York to waltz into the playoffs. But Cincinnati is a better team, Sanchez is terrible in big games, and dang it I have to hope. Plus, that would be terrible karma if Cincinnati did that, and they need all they can get with the playoffs looming.

Bungles over Jets

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 16

Football can be so beautiful in the freshly fallen snow. Well, except when it’s 2 feet of snow, and it gives ding dongs in New York and Philadelphia something to throw onto the field other than beer bottles and hot dogs.

Opening Kickoff

What is this euphoric feeling that has overcome me this week? I don’t know; it seems so foreign. I think I recall feeling this way before. Why, it must be what it feels like to win a game. It has been so long, I had almost forgotten.

The Way It Was

Did I see that right? The Raiders started Charlie Frye at quarterback? Wow. How much do they hate JaMarcus Russell?

Wait, the Panthers sacked Brett Favre? Is that even allowed in the NFL?

Browns running back Jerome Harrison rushed for 286 yards, while all purpose magician Josh Cribbs returned two kickoffs for touchdowns. You wonder if Browns fans just beat their heads against the wall muttering, where have they been all season…

With his 2 returns, Cribbs now holds the all time NFL record for kick returns. I’d say something smart alecky, but he almost had 2 returns against Pittsburgh, so I should just shut my yapper.

Fear not Saints fans. Yes, the miraculous idea of a perfect season is gone. But hey, keep the focus in front. Wouldn’t a Lombardi Trophy look snazzy in the Mardi Gras parade? You bet it would!

Oh look, the Colts won again. Wouldn’t it be nice to see them win it all just to stick it to the Pats?

Detroit placed Matt Stafford on injured reserve, and the rookie quarterback will have surgery on his injured knee. For the hard luck fans of the Lions, I hope this is not a harbinger of doom and merely a bump in the road of a quarterback’s development.

Wow, how far, fast and completely Seattle has fallen into an NFL also ran. How do you lose at home to Tampa Bay, who also fell just as swiftly?

Really Arizona, you had to go into overtime to beat the Lions? Yeesh, even Pittsburgh was able to dispatch Detroit in regulation.

Ok, Jets collapse at the end of the game against Atlanta and Houston has to barely eke one out against the Rams. Terrible right? So how again are they ahead of Pittsburgh in the wild card race? Oh yeah, Chiefs, Raiders and Browns, that’s how.

Unbelievably, Denver lost at home to the Raiders. Somewhere Mike Shanahan is fuming.

Oh, what a shocker, Jay Cutler had yet another crappy game. I’m stunned.

A gift basket recently showed up at Viking headquarters. The card attached said, “Dear Brett and Brad, thanks for the job extension. Love ya bunches. John Fox.”

The Steel Pit

Yes it was messy. Yes the defense surrendered yet another lead. And yes it means nothing in the overall picture of the playoffs. But damn it felt good to win again.

What a fabulous, exciting, thrilling, heart stopping, bowel moving victory by the boys in Black and Gold! Not only am I still buzzing from the first Steeler win in weeks, but also because of the exciting finish to a wild back and forth affair.

There was plenty of good to go around thanks to a very potent offense. Rashard Mendenhall had an excellent game rushing and receiving and is now a hair away from becoming the seventh Steeler to log a 1000 yard rushing season.

Mike Wallace served notice that he is no longer a rookie and will be a very potent threat in the future.

And Ben Roethlisberger threw for 503 yards, becoming only the third quarterback in league history to throw for over 500 yards and 3 touchdowns with no interceptions. His 503 yards also set the Steelers single game yardage record.

But this year, it seems there can be no amount of good with an equal amount of bad. William Gay fell down in coverage, again. Ryan Clark was smoked for a touchdown in the 4^th quarter, when it mattered most of course. The secondary looked in general nothing short of horrendous. And in the 4^th quarter the defense gave up an atrocious 22 points.

Look, not fooling myself. I know the odds are long for Pittsburgh to make the playoffs. And even if they should, the same problems that need addressed in the offseason will still remain. But watching the offense drive the field in the last two minutes to conclude with Mike Wallace catching the winning touchdown as time expired may be the moment of the season. If only because it harkens memories of Super Bowl 43 and gives hope for the future. And right now, in a season of disappointment, I’ll grab any hope I can get.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Pepsi has decided to pull it’s advertising from the Super Bowl, ending a 23 year run, to focus its marketing on more online efforts. Well, that and someone at Pepsi finally realized it’s super expensive.

Apparently, Ochocinco and Shawn “Roids Out” Merriman wanted to fight. Since Twitter is involved, I question whether they really don’t like each other enough to exchange blows, or if they’re just being twits.

In honor of Chris Henry, Ochocinco wanted to wear his jersey during the game against the Chargers. But too many people tried to make it into a negative and accused Chad of making Henry’s death all about him. Normally, with professional athlete’s I would agree. But I think in this case, Chad was being sincere. And he should have been allowed to proceed with his tribute.

In other Bengal news, the team attended the funeral for Chris Henry. I wonder how many of the attendees felt about his fiancée speaking during the services considering how Henry died. I’m not being disrespectful, just curious.

I’m getting real sick of the halftime opinion pieces put forth by NBC’s Bob Costas. Can someone tell him this is Sunday Night Football, not Olympic coverage?

The Panthers placed Jake Delhomme on injured reserve due to a broken finger on his throwing hand. Should have placed him there long before due to a broken head.

The Cleveland Browns hired Mike Holmgren as their new team President and football czar. I hope they got more than three magic beans for him. And I hope Eric Mangini has his resume updated.

The Pittsburgh Steelers announced another new investor in their ownership group. Boy, that owner’s box is getting awfully full.

Speaking of the Steelers, thanks to Paul Lukas of ESPN’s Page 2 Uni Watch for this great article about the history of the Steelers uniforms and some of the quirks found in their iconic duds. The section on Polamalu is fascinating in itself, and knowing what I know of the man, unsurprising.

Upon Further Review

Playoffs?!? Let’s talk about playoffs!

As we head into the weekend, the Broncos, Ravens, Jets, Jaguars, Texans, Steelers and Dolphins are all fighting for the two wildcard playoff spots. Yes, some teams have a better chance at nabbing those spots than others, and some teams need an extraordinary amount of help for their playoff dreams to come true. But all teams have a mathematical chance of grabbing one of those coveted post season positions.

Now, while this may cause the players themselves, their front offices, coaching staffs, stadium personnel and fan bases much nervousness, worry and consternation as to what may happen, the league itself absolutely loves this situation.

The NFL loves having 7 teams fighting for 2 playoff spots. It allows the league to continue maintaining their idea of parity amongst the teams in the NFL. It adds to the overall popularity and financial success of the league to be able to tell fans that yes, in any given year your favorite team does have a chance to win it all. There never is haves and have nots, everyone has a shot.

Such a scenario keeps 5 fan bases engaged and buying product in some form or another much deeper into the season. Typically, when a fan base watches their team eliminated from potential post season action, said fan base becomes disinterested and peels away from focusing on the game for other pursuits, say spending time with family or reading.

Now, the NFL already knows that after week one, Rams, Lions and Raider fans on parole will lose interest. But if they can keep the other 29 franchise fan bases engaged, then that keeps product moving, concession sales high, turnstiles spinning and ratings climbing. The longer the NFL can keep each fan base riveted to rooting their team and thinking they may hit the post season, the better.

Being able to point to a season like this one, with 7 teams just in one conference so late in the season engaged in a playoff battle helps strengthen the league’s argument that a fan’s favorite team always has a chance. It’s a better advertisement for the NFL as a whole than plugging the Colts quietly going for perfection.

Just on a side note, I know the Colts are a long way away from obtaining perfection. I think we’ve seen ample evidence through the years that this goal is extremely difficult and all but one who have come close have failed. So I understand why the Colts quest may be underplayed. But doesn’t it seem the overall hoopla of the Colts chasing an undefeated season is far lower than it was two years ago with the Patriots? In 2007 you could not get away from Patriot this and Patriot that. And let’s be honest, that constant, non stop adulation sure made their loss in Super Bowl 42 all the more satisfying. Perhaps that’s a reason why we hear not nearly the buzz. No one wants to celebrate if the Colts should fail.

Regardless, I say to all those fan bases, sit back and revel in your team’s potential chance at playoff glory. Don’t get frustrated, worked up, worried, nervous or crazy. Enjoy the ride. I know the registers and executives at the league offices in New York certainly are.

He Said He Said

“It’s hard to believe the cornerbacks for the Steelers don’t have an interception all season.” – Fox’s Joe Buck during the Steelers/Packers collision.

Uhhh, Joe, no it’s not.

"So I said, 'I'm staying in the game, I'm playing.' I don't know if [Childress' effort] was exactly to protect me, or we had seven points, I'm not sure. That's his call. But we talked it out. We didn't have time, I didn't have time to sit there and say why or what. My response was, we've got to win this ballgame and I want to stay in and do whatever I can.'' – Vikings quarterback Brett Favre

Translation: Do you know who I am? I’m freaking Brett Favre and there’s no way I’m leaving this game no matter how crappy I play!

"Tony said we had no chance. No chance? None? He was a coach. He should know you always have a chance.'' - Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo saying how Tony Dungy’s comments inspired the Cowboys in their defeat of the Saints.

Well, Tony Dungy can be an inspirational gentleman.

"We had 30 minutes of evidence that we could drive the ball on them, we also conversely had 30 minutes of evidence to show they could also drive the ball on us. That's why we took the risk when we did.” – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin on his decision to kick an onside kick late in the 4^th quarter

Yeah, and the evidence against the Steeler defense was quite damning.

“How the mighty defense has fallen. Wow. Mike Tomlin throwing his D to the wolves.” – SI.com’s Peter King

Hey, Peter, the truth hurts. Just ask Steeler Nation, we’ve been watching it all season.

''We don't need to throw snowballs. We're a classy crew here in Philadelphia.” – Eagles head coach Andy Reid

Yeah right.

"It's probably hard for people to wrap their heads and their fingers around, but this offense is changing, This team is changing on offense. It's not a run-it-first team anymore. And that's not a bad thing, it really isn't. We've got two 1,000-yard receivers. We'll have a 1,000-yard rusher. It's a pretty fun thing." – Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger

Oh Ben, unlike a good many Yinzers, I have no issue with a pass first team. My umbrage lies with a defense that cannot keep up.

Idiot of the week

This week, we have dual award winners, the Vikings Brett Favre and Brad Childress. Due to their antics on the sidelines and in the locker room after the team’s meltdown at Carolina, the Vikings are now in a rather precarious position of cooling down before the playoffs even get here.

The Vikings have an excellent defense and a great running game. They just needed good, consistent quarterback play to push them over the hump. Childress and Favre made a deal with the devil to join forces with each other, and now, the first payment is coming due. And no one is happy with the price tag.

Favre figured at first that yeah, he’ll play the good team guy, throwing for say 200 yards a game just to keep defenses honest from stacking the box against Adrian Peterson. But somewhere along the way, his ego got the best of him. I know, you’re shocked, as am I. Favre knew the weak spot of this team was quarterback, and that’s why he was brought in. But now he wants to be the savior. He wants to be the one people point to when they talk about this Vikings team. He wants to hear, “The Vikings would never have won it all without Brett Favre.” He needs that.

Favre wants the glory, the adulation and the accolades. Favre feels he’s the man. He’s above criticism, questioning and, unfortunately for Childress, coaching and discipline. And when you get a player like that, you get back talk and a refusal to sit out for the betterment of the team. And that leads to explosive arguments and an open questioning of the coach in front of the team.

And now we hear he’s changing play calls at the line. He’s eschewing his best weapon, Peterson, to put the ball in his own hands. He does what he feels will give the Vikings the best chance to win, and his actions show that feeling is Brett Favre back to pass. Plus, you get the distinct impression Favre has no confidence or respect for Childress as a coach or play caller. Well, Brett’s a pretty big idiot, because what did he expect there? Head coaches in general like to think of themselves as kings lording over their charges. Mini geniuses who every call, word and action should be studied as brilliance personified and never, ever questioned. If Favre thought Childress would operate outside of this norm and kowtow to Brett, then he is dumber than previously thought.

Now, let’s not fool ourselves, star players get special treatment. Is it fair in a sport where team is heralded above all else? No. But it is reality. So a star player will always react poorly to being treated like any other player. So when Childress foolishly tries to just that, you get Brett getting all up in Brad’s Kool-aid.

You think after seeing that display the other players will feel they need to listen to Childress? Oh heck no, they’ll follow the “great” Brett Favre. And thus far, that is exactly what they are doing, rallying around Favre instead of their coach. They are willingly following this egomaniac to what will be their early playoff exit.

As for Childress, what did he expect would happen? He voluntarily emasculated himself to “convince” Favre the Vikings needed him. Something Favre had established two years ago. Now, when this headstrong jagoff starts changing plays and freelancing, something he’s been known to do for, oh, his entire career, Childress gets upset? Did you really think Favre would stick solely to the script you wrote Brad? Did you not think he’d change plays as he saw fit? Brett has played a ton of games, and has established in his own mind that his abilities and experience can find the best solution for any situation. And his track record has shown that he will follow those instincts above all else.

On top of that, Childress should have known that Brett does what’s best for Brett. That was obvious when he orchestrated his messy divorce from Green Bay, a team and fan base that made him a super duper star. Did he really think he could control this man and fit him into a mold he needed for his team to win? That’s just foolish. Plus, Childress should have known what he’d get with Favre late in the season. This article by Sal Paolantonio clearly shows Favre’s fading late season skills, and the article was written before Brett ever donned Jets green. And we all know how that season ended for New York. If Childress honestly thought Brett would fall into line and be a good little soldier, do what he was told and be a late season hero, he’s dumber than previously thought.

So, because these two massive morons made a deal with each other to win it all, yet fully expected the other to change and bend to their own wills, and now are creating a rift that could tear the Vikings apart before one playoff snap is taken, Brett and Brad you are both idiots.

On Tap This Week

No, I did not do quite as well as the previous week, but hey, still not bad.

Last week: 10-6

Season to date: 155-68

As the season winds to a close and the top of my pool becomes tighter and more fevered in pitch, I feel like Robert DeNiro near the end of Midnight Run. I’ve come too far, I’m too close…

Sunday

Tampa Bay (2-12) at New Orleans (13-1)

Yes, New Orleans finally stumbled. But there’s no way I’m breaking an ankle jumping off this bandwagon. My seats are too sweet.

Saints over Buccaneers

Jacksonville (7-7) at New England (9-5)

Jacksonville is fighting, if you can call it that, for their playoff lives. New England is fighting for their division. Hmmm, I wonder whom I should back…

Patriots over Jaguars

Houston (7-7) at Miami (7-7)

This week, go fins! Next week, suck on it you oxygen breathing fish.

Dolphins over Texans

Seattle (5-9) at Green Bay (9-5)

Ok, now back to being a fan of the Pack.

Packers over Seahawks

Carolina (6-8) at New York Giants (8-6)

Wow, what a game Carolina put together against the Vikings. Now, they’ll predictably crap the bed the next week. I suppose there’s a chance they may not, since there’s no way Jake Delhomme will be a part of the festivities. But I’m not banking on it.

Giants over Panthers

Oakland (5-9) at Cleveland (3-11)

Ugh. Well, if they can put that kind of offensive effort together again, I suppose I may have to say the Browns. But I don’t feel good about it, for a multitude of reasons.

Browns over Raiders

Baltimore (8-6) at Pittsburgh (7-7)

It’s time for some payback, no matter how the wildcard chips land. Never give up, never surrender!

Steelers over Ravens

Kansas City (3-11) at Cincinnati (9-5)

Back at home, the Bungles will have the cathartic game they need to honor Chris Henry.

Bengals over Chiefs

Buffalo (5-9) at Atlanta (7-7)

Yeesh, what do you do with two teams playing for nothing? Well, Atlanta is looking to finally have two winning seasons in a row for the first time since, ever.

Falcons over Bills

St. Louis (1-13) at Arizona (9-5)

Ok, Arizona, I swear if you screw me again this week. I’m driving to Glendale and soaping your windows.

Cardinals over Rams

Detroit (2-12) at San Francisco (6-8)

Poor Detroit has so little going for it right now how can you possibly pick them? Well, I suppose you could if you’re a Detroit fan and a masochist.

49ers over Lions

Denver (8-6) at Philadelphia (10-4)

Denver is showing that no matter the coach, December is a bad month. And with Philadelphia still having a shot at a first round bye, sounds like a recipe for an Andy Reid celebratory buffet!

Eagles over Broncos

New York Jets (7-7) at Indianapolis (14-0)

I hate the Jets. Of course, by saying that, it could qualify me to be a Jets fan. Shudder at the thought. Indianapolis has nothing more to play for, except I think Peyton may finally want to stick it to Belichick. He’d never say it out loud, but you can see he has a new look in his eyes.

Colts over Jets

Dallas (9-5) at Washington (4-10)

Wow, Dallas won a big game in December! I’m as stunned as the Saints fans. Of course, this week when I give them a chance they’ll crap the bed. But hey, I’ll take a chance. Romo did fairly well for me in fantasy this year.

Cowboys over Redskins

Monday

Minnesota (11-3) at Chicago (5-9)

Luckily for Childress and Favre, the Vikings defense and Adrian Peterson by himself could handle this situation. Or more luckily, Jay Cutler will take care of beating Chicago for them.

Vikings over Bears

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 16 Thursday Night Special

Welcome to a special Friday Christmas edition of The Crystal Ball Thursday night special! If the NFL Network can use such dumb and confusing nomenclatures for their various broadcasts, so can I.

Is everyone having a good Christmas? Did you get all you wanted, or did Santa find out you were naughty instead of nice?

Since Christmas is the time for hope and joy, there are more than a few fans out there wishing for their hopes of wins to provide the joy of a trip to the playoffs. I hate to be a scrooge, but bah humbug. There will be more than a few disappointed fan bases after Sunday. I won’t be one of them, I’m anticipating failure.

Regardless, I hope every fan savors this moment right here. The moment when hope still abounds, when chance and luck may collide and become opportunity realized. When all the stars align, all becomes right with their world and the dreams of a championship still burn brightly. Most of those dreams will never come to pass this season, but that moment of hopeful anticipation is a wonderful thing.

And hey, it is Christmas after all, you never know what may happen right?

On Tap Tonight

San Diego (11-3) at Tennessee (7-7)

Ok, so what do I do here? Tennessee has been on a decided tear since being humiliated in New England. With the exception of a loss to Indianapolis, which was close, the team has torn it up and Chris Johnson has been a demon on the field. On the other hand, San Diego is riding a wicked winning streak, playing dominant football and over the past several years, unstoppable in December.

I love Tennessee’s moxie, Vince Young’s resurgence and Johnson’s otherworldly ability. And I hate, HATE, the idea of backing Norv Turner on the road. But San Diego can still nab a bye week for the playoffs so they’ve got a goal in mind. Tennessee, well their playoff hopes while still flickering are dimmer than Pittsburgh’s. And we all know how faint those are. So what’s their motivation other than 9-7? Ugh, I may regret this, and probably will since I’ve already vacillated several times, but…

Chargers over Titans

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 15

Christmas is but a few scant days away, I have none of my shopping done, the driveway is full of freshly fallen snow that needs shoveled, the busy holidays are ramping up and I need to prepare for my annual cornucopia of joy that is 24 hours of A Christmas Story. But hey, there’s always time for football, no?

Opening Kickoff

Hey I was right! I said Randy Moss would be a potential distraction and cancer to the Patriots and it was a foolish move by Belichick to bring on such a malcontent. I just happened to be a few years off as to when this would come to pass. I’m ahead of my time.

The Way It Was

Broncos’ receiver Brandon Marshall broke the single game reception record by catching 21 passes against the Colts. Unfortunately the Broncos lost. But lost in this story? How about that passing by Kyle Orton!

The Ravens beat up on the poor little Lions. Boy they are just big mean bullies.

DeMarcus Ware sprained his neck in a scary moment during last weeks Cowboys game. Thankfully, Ware will be ok

Oh look, Dallas is collapsing, Christmas must be coming! Every time a bell rings the Cowboys lose a game. Ding, dong, ding, dong….

The Patriots look like a shell of themselves lately. And if they are not careful, the hard charging Dolphins will overtake them in the AFC East. I’m just glad Steeler fans are not the only ones suffering this season.

What? Randy Moss was not playing hard? Moss quit on the team? I’m stunned.

Awww Ochocinco hugged the Viking. He’s so sweet.

The Colts set a regular season record for consecutive regular season victories with 22, while establishing the most wins of the decade, 115 and counting, and clinching home field advantage throughout the playoffs. Not bad for a team with young receivers, a young defense and a new head coach.

Boy the Eagles got a steal when they drafted DeShawn Jackson.

I’ve said it before and will say it again. Andy Reid sure can drag out the end of a half. I swear he turns 2 minutes into 30 in a blink of an eye.

Oh come on Arizona, give me a break. You cream the Vikings, but then turn the ball over against the 49ers like it was filled with H1N1? Really?

Titans linebacker Keith Bulluck had 10 tackles, two interceptions and a pass broken up against the Rams and has been lauded this week.

Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco had a 65 percent passing day and throwing for 548 yards against the Lions and has been lauded this week.

Yes, these were great performances, and many have said the ills that suffered these two teams have now been eliminated. But let me just point out one thing. These big games came against the Rams and Lions respectively. So, is everything fixed, or did two teams just beat up thoroughly on two NFL doormats? You decide.

The Steel Pit

After losing their 5^th game in a row a week ago Thursday, things have been relatively quiet. Not only has the team not been very talkative, but most of the national press has pretty much ignored them as well. No news is good news right?

Oh, most everyone has healed as well as they are going do with 10 days off, and the team will have most of its full complement of players ready for Sunday. There will be a few personnel changes for the game, some most likely way overdue. But hey things are quiet, so there may be some peace for a change.

Oh wait, what’s that? Yup, I thought so. It’s a bomb.

I wonder if Tomlin will be able to keep this team from a total meltdown now. Sorry Mike, but the honeymoon’s over.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

The Cowboys tried a little 3-D experiment on the big screens at Cowboys Stadium. I guess the actual 3-D game wasn’t enough for Jerry.

Uh oh, the Yinzers are getting restless.

Drew Brees was elected to ride on a 2010 Mardi Gras float and chosen as King of Bacchus. Wouldn’t it be great if he were also carrying the Lombardi Trophy during the parade?

Robert Sormanti, the Patriots' mascot, was arrested in a prostitution sting in Rhode Island. I bet he could party with Steely McBeam.

Colts head Coach Jim Caldwell never moves, never gets excited, rarely makes a facial expression, doesn’t rant at players or referees and I’m not sure if he’s even breathing. I’m wondering if he’s just a robot created in the off season by Peyton Manning, who then programs the Caldwell-Tron 2010 to call the plays he wants to run. Show me proof this is not so. Because now the Caldwell-Tron 2010 has been programmed for Peyton to go for 19-0, and with Peyton at the helm I think they’ve got a shot.

The Giants and Jets will submit a proposal to the NFL to host the 2014 Super Bowl in their new stadium. Yeah, that’s where people want to go in February, New Jersey.

The Redskins general manager Vinny Cerrato resigned this week, and was immediately replaced by Bruce Allen. Jim Zorn, get that resume ready.

Upon Further Review

This week, Bengals receiver Chris Henry died from injuries suffered in a strange car accident. Henry had been away from the team as he recovered from a broken arm suffered in a game earlier this season. The NFL will hold a moment of silence for Henry before each game this weekend.

I think most people who follow the NFL are aware of the checkered past Henry has had. I shall not use the occasion of this young man’s death to revisit them. Neither will I ignore his transgressions of the past. Henry was not a saint and for the majority of his adult life, facts that are well recognized. And if not for a benevolent, and desperate for a receiver, Bengals organization he would not even have been in the league this season.

Despite his past, Henry did seem sincere in both words and actions to turn his life around with this latest second chance. And it is because of this I feel for his family, friends and loved ones and send my heartfelt condolences.

Some people take longer to learn the lessons of life. And often they must learn those lessons the hard way. Henry seemed to me to be one of these people. But it appeared that finally, some of life’s lessons had sunk in and the realization of what it took to be a man and take his special gifts seriously had dawned upon him.

The sad part is when he finally turns this corner, his life was extinguished. Never will he get the chance to live the new life he had started to build. Never will those who loved and cared for him finally get to see the man they knew he could be. And never will those who believed in him see that promise pay off.

You always hope to see those misguided souls that contain great talent to finally reach their potential and become all we hope they can be. And with their success, spread to the rest of us the hope and give us an example that we too can overcome the odds against us in our own lives to achieve more. And when that promising light is snuffed too soon, no matter from whom it shown, it dims all of our worlds and pushes hope for ourselves further out of reach.

No, we shouldn’t look to others as a guide to how to live our own lives. The onus of that remains firmly on each person and each person only. But knowing that others as flawed as us can overcome problems similar to our own has always been inspirational and motivating. And when one who starts to walk the path of personal redemption is taken from us, it also takes away that motivation and inspiration from those who could really benefit from it. And that only adds to the overall tragedy, of which we need no more.

He Said He Said

“This is gonna be the best game of my life. I can feel it.'' - Broncos receiver Brandon Marshall before the Colts game where he set the single game record for receptions with 21.

How did he know that? I wonder if he can do that with lottery numbers…

"I'm not worried. His useless banter really doesn't amount to much at all.'' - Cincinnati head coach Marvin Lewis on the antics of Chad Ochocinco

Why worry? Just sit back and enjoy the stylings of Ochocinco.

"I would turn in all three Super Bowl rings and my Hall of Fame bust for one undefeated season.'' - Former Cowboy Michael Irvin

Gee, with statements like that, I cannot imagine why no one takes Irvin seriously as an analyst.

"I don't see the big deal about it. The president cheated on his wife. We're all human. Human beings are the only ones that have just one partner. You watch National Geographic and the lions, they have like five or six partners. The human race is the only being that is monogamous with partners.'' - Seattle wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh commenting on the Tiger Woods situation

T.J. you’re as wrong about this as you were about leaving Cincinnati. Penguins mate for life.

“Best records in football since the start of 2007: Colts 38-7, Patriots 35-10” – SI.com’s Peter King

And the total Super Bowl wins combined during that time? Zero.

"Wouldn't it be smart if he took $30,000 and, oh, I don't know, bought winter coats for 1,000 kids in Cincinnati? Can't he find a better use for that money than continue to hand it to the league?'' – CBS’s Randy Cross on the fines levied against Bengals receiver Chad Ochocinco

Yes Randy that would be a good idea. You know what he does do? Well Chad does things like when he was here in Pittsburgh, he offered on Twitter that if someone would come to his hotel and drive him around he’d treat them to a shopping spree. Which he did happily. He also likes to act wacky and goofy and bring a bit of fun to a league a bit too stuffy and image conscious. You know what he doesn’t do? Crimes, drugs, drink or commit violent acts against people. And the NFL puts the money from player fines into various disease research centers, charitable initiatives and player assistance funds. So get a sense of humor Cross you douche bag.

“I can't get over Randy Moss. If you didn't see the game, find someone who TiVOed it. Disgraceful.” – SI.com’s Peter King

Disgraceful? Come on Peter, you couldn’t catch a cold let alone a football so withhold judgment of someone who actually can catch. And jeez, you’ve seen this man’s body of work, are you really that surprised he’d suddenly make it all about Randy? King’s just mad because he put Moss on his all decade team and a performance like that makes King look dumb.

"The Steelers are done." – Former Steeler Jerome Bettis on Dan Patrick’s radio show

"Jerome who?" – Steelers’ quarterback Ben Roethlisberger’s initial reaction when asked about Bettis’ comments.

Idiot of the week

This is getting really repetitive, and annoying, but once again a Steeler must be awarded this dubious honor.

Our winner this week is safety Ryan Clark, for his bizarre meltdown during a press conference this week. Now, with the team freefalling into the abyss, the players in an angry funk, and the coaches and management unable or unwilling to take command and turn this thing around I do not begrudge Clark for unraveling. Heck, if someone didn’t show how much the situation was getting to them, I’d wonder if any of them were human.

So why is Ryan here? Well, because he lashed out at the media, who has loved him since he became a Steeler. He railed on their coverage of the team and how it’s been unfair and they do not understand how hard the team is working. He even said they are held to a higher standard and how other markets are not as critical of their teams.

Ryan, that’s just dumb. Most other markets are more critical or they just don’t care. And we know you’re working hard, but there are no results to show for it. You want the press to write something good? Win a game.

Then he lashed out at the fans, which is just a dumb mistake. Steeler Nation is one of the most fiercely loyal fan bases of any team in any sport. And despite the team collapsing like a flan, they’ve still been behind the team. To question them may be one of the most idiotic things a player can do.

The dumbest part of all this is easily that Clark lashed out at everyone outside the organization whilst his play has been a major contributor to the defense’s 4^th quarter collapse and while he’s in a contract year and looking for a new deal with the team. Ryan, do you really think they can sign you again now after dumping on the fans?

So Ryan Clark, while I like you as a person and a player, you’ve given me no choice. You are an idiot.

On Tap This Week

Ok, so we had a few set backs recently, but last week, a rousing performance has narrowed the gap between 1^st and 4^th place and the pressure just increased tenfold.

Last week: 13-3

Season to date: 145 - 62

I cannot say it enough, I want that Wii Fit. Let’s see who blinks first. The final push begins…

Saturday

Dallas (8-5) at New Orleans (13-0)

This game on the NFL Network is a special Saturday edition of Thursday Night Football. Why they couldn’t just call it Saturday Night Football, you’ve got me. Regardless, it matters not what nomenclature they use, it still means the same thing at the end of the game.

Saints over Cowboys

Sunday

New England (8-5) at Buffalo (5-8)

Hmmm, Belichick seems to have a few problems on his hands. Somehow, I do not think Buffalo qualifies as one of them.

Patriots over Bills

Miami (7-6) at Tennessee (5-7)

Miami is coming on strong and fighting not just for a playoff spot, but the division as well. But they have yet to see Chris Johnson in person.

Titans over Dolphins

Houston (6-7) at St. Louis (1-12)

Oh look, Houston wins a meaningless game when all pressure of a playoff opportunity has been removed.

Texans over Rams

Arizona (8-5) at Detroit (2-11)

Ok, if Arizona screws me this week, I’m totally putting coal in their stockings.

Cardinals over Lions

Atlanta (6-7) at New York Jets (7-6)

Yes, Chris Redman has played well in relief of Matt Ryan. But hey, the Jets have a shot at the division. So who has more at stake?

Jets over Falcons

Cleveland (2-11) at Kansas City (3-10)

Ewww.

Chiefs over Browns

Oakland (4-9) at Denver (8-5)

I still miss how Shanahan made it his personal mission to stick it to Al Davis. At least somewhere he will watch proudly as the Neck Beard continues the tradition.

Broncos over Raiders

Cincinnati (9-4) at San Diego (10-3)

I don’t know where the Bungles passing game went, but they’re not going far without something to distract from the run.

Chargers over Bungles

Chicago (5-8) at Baltimore (7-6)

What’s the over/under on interceptions made by Ed Reed on Jay Cutler? 10? 11?

Ravens over Bears

San Francisco (6-7) at Philadelphia (9-4)

I was impressed by Philadelphia by showing resolve after losing the lead last week against the Giants. Perhaps they may finally have found a pair.

Eagles over 49ers

Tampa Bay (1-12) at Seattle (5-8)

Well, it is a home game. I suppose that means Seattle will dominate by double digits.

Seahawks over Buccaneers

Green Bay (9-4) at Pittsburgh (6-7)

Do I honestly believe Pittsburgh has a team capable of beating Green Bay? Yes. Do I believe Pittsburgh will defeat them? I have my doubts. But hey, it’s Christmas, a time of miracles. So be of good cheer and pure of heart Steeler Nation. Sometimes Christmas comes early if you only believe.

Steelers over Packers

Minnesota (11-2) at Carolina (5-8)

I don’t care anymore what Carolina team shows up. I’m going with the Minnesota team that has that one quarterback, you know, the one who does Wrangler commercials? I’ve heard he’s pretty good.

Vikings over Panthers

Monday

New York Giants (7-6) at Washington (4-9)

Oh I have no idea. I suppose it’s time for New York to win something.

Giants over Redskins

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 15 Thursday Night Special

Welcome to week 15 of the NFL season, where we converge on exciting Jacksonville! Yes, I said it. Come on Jacksonville is exciting. They have Tim Tebow and……Tim Tebow.

For tonight’s game, the City of Jacksonville and a group called “Touchdown Jacksonville-Revive the Pride” will be hosting a Tealgate party. The aim is to get the local fans involved, engaged and excited about the Jaguars and having an NFL team in their fair city.

Something tells me this is like fighting a fire with a slow running spigot and a sippy cup. Tonight will mark the first time this season the Jaguars will NOT be blacked out in their local market. That’s right. Even though the NFL gave the team permission to cover a large portion of their seating to create the illusion of selling out the stadium, they still cannot. Even though the team is decent and better than say half of the remainder of the NFL, the locals really do not care. Oh, I’m sure there’s a feverish group dedicated to the team. But the majority would rather watch the Gators.

If the Jaguars leave town, would anyone care? Ask me in two years when we’re rooting for the Los Angeles or London Jaguars.

On Tap Tonight

Indianapolis (13-0) at Jacksonville (7-6)

I know, the word on the street is the upset is looming. Jacksonville, fighting for their playoff lives, will be set to topple Peyton and company. The Colts will rest their dinged up starters and risk losing for the first time this season to get healthy for the playoffs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I say meh to it. If Jacksonville had all that much fight in them, then tell me why they crapped the bed, at home, last week to Miami? Oh, they had the opportunity, but not the execution. What makes you think they will on a short week against one of the best teams in the NFL? Yes, you can sit around and tell me stats about how the Colts have just squeaked by in some of their wins, and how well Jacksonville did in their last match up. But you know what? I’m not buying it. Yeah, there’s a good chance the Jags could come out and do a number on Indianapolis’ back ups. But I’d rather back Peyton for 2 quarters or less than David Garrard for an entire game.

Colts over Jaguars

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 14

It happens once a season. I put my picks in, don’t pay attention then have to root for a crappy team to pull off the upset. This year, I accidentally picked Tampa Bay over Carolina. Oops. Such a mistake would not have been so bad if not for the fact that I was risking a pick with the Titans already. Double oops.

Opening Kickoff

More than ever, I maintain the Black and Gold are going to the Super Bowl and I’ll be right behind them. With the Steelers season effectively over, New Orleans is now the official temporary team of the Crystal Ball, and we’ll root them all the way to Miami. Go Saints!

I know that sounds like fan sacrilege, but trust me, it’s cool. We’ll revisit this come playoff time.

The Way It Was

In Atlanta, Michael Vick ran and threw for a touchdown against the Falcons. Not only that, the Falcon fans cheered him. Amazing how time can heal all wounds.

Ha ha, Patriots lost again. Yes, it’s a minor consolation in yet another disappointing week from the current NFL champions, but I’ll take a Patriot embarrassment too.

Are the Redskins playing to keep Zorn’s job? It looks like it, except yet again they came up short.

Amazing, the Saints looked like it would be over, yet they pulled it out. That’s how a champion plays.

Really Mike Singletary? That’s how you roll? You put the boots to a decent AFC team but cannot finish off a horrid NFC division opponent? Come on!

Thank you Cowboys, for allowing me to watch two horrid defensive performances in a row.

Has there been a better heads up play than Robert Meacham stripping the ball after an interception and then running it back for a touchdown? Not for my money there hasn’t.

Wait; is there a brewing quarterback controversy in Kansas City? Is the great Matt Cassel not working out? Really? Who would have thought paying a career back up big money without seeing proof he can lead a team in more than relief duty would be a bad idea! Hmmmm, maybe the Buffalo Bills?

I’m thinking that perhaps there is some truth to the theory that Scott Pioli really didn’t do all that much in New England. Isn’t it funny how everyone who leaves there fails miserably? You best watch out Josh McDaniels.

Ok, so Tim Ruskell leaves as general manager of the Seahawks. The team is a mess, obviously, and it will take some real work to put it back together as a Super Bowl contender. But I question why Seattleites are going gaga over the possibility of Mike Holmgren taking the job. Isn’t he one of the reasons the team is in the condition it is now? I know he hasn’t been the GM in quite some time, but I’m sure he has some significant input in turning this team into poo on a shingle.

Josh Freeman you made me look dumber than usual. Really, 5 interceptions in your game, two of them coming in the red zone? Josh, I need no help looking foolish, thank you very much.

Wow, Rex Grossman made it into a game. Now Texan fans know Chicago’s pain. He was so bad Matt Schaub miraculously recovered from his injury.

The Steel Pit

Somehow it seems fitting that the season ended with a whimper on a terribly cold night in Cleveland. I’m not sure why, but it just seemed fitting.

You know what’s been amazing about Pittsburgh’s collapse? Each week they lose, and I think, wow this is awful. There’s no way it can get any worse. They’ll beat next week’s patsy I’m sure. And then next week comes, we crumble against said patsy and somehow it gets worse. Actually at this point, I’m fascinated and amazed by this phenomenon.

Oh, I still have to fight off the urge to vomit. After all I did just watch Pittsburgh lose to two of the crappiest teams in the NFL, as well as completely torpedo any hope at the playoffs, in the span of 4 days. But I’m still amazed.

I could go off into a rant about William Gay and Tyrone Carter getting schooled, again. Or possibly expound on the defenses struggles, again. I thought of even going off on the offense and their unimaginable ability to move the ball against the Cleveland Browns. Or even Bruce Arians ridiculous play calling that seems to always stifle drives and confound his team.

I thought of the embarrassment of losing to Eric Mangenius or Tomlin’s promise of change left unfulfilled. Maybe even expounding on the fact that Cleveland has scored a total of one touchdown by a running back this season, and it was Thursday night. Or, horribly, I thought of discussing the 8 sacks given up by the offense, both the fault of an ineffective offensive line and an indecisive Roethlisberger. But you now what? Actually right now I feel good.

Yes, the Steelers season is effectively over. A playoff spot would require winning out and having a mondo amount of luck, which most likely will not happen. But I actually feel fine about it. I know, that sounds absurd, but I do. I feel strangely, yet wonderfully, liberated.

Now for the remainder of the season, I can watch games merely for the joy of it, instead of sitting on eggshells hoping that our flaws are not exposed and that the team can pull out a win. I need not worry about the playoffs and a potential collapse in the post season, because it just won’t happen. I feel free in an odd way.

Sure, another Super Bowl would have been wonderful, and really stuck it to the Patriots. But you cannot win it every year, and the team still has the most wins in the big game than any other team. In addition, I get to potentially see the enjoyment of a team win the Super Bowl that never has before. Go Saints!

And the plus side of all the team’s deficiencies being put on display is that now the coaching staff and team administration can look at the team with objective eyes, work to fix those flaws and build a better team for next year. I know, it’s grasping at straws, but I’ll take any positive I can.

Although in some ways negative and some ways positive, 2009 has been quite memorable for the Pittsburgh Steelers. So come on boys, let’s go out in style and kick a few more fannies. Call it a gift to your fans, because we need one right about now. And after all, it’s almost Christmas!

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Oh look, Tom and Gisele had a baby last week! If Tom has a baby, then how can he be a baby? Curiosity abounds.

After a touchdown last week, Chad Ochocinco strode to the sidelines and donned a poncho and sombrero. For his wacky antic, the NFL fined him $30,000. Thank goodness for Chad, because he promised more to come. I’m strangely curious to see what he’ll do in the playoffs.

In a recap of the decade, Sports Illustrated released a bunch of best of lists this week. One of my favorites was Peter King’s; specifically for his playoff game and Super Bowl game choices. Ahhh, good times.

Redskin Clinton Portis has been placed on injured reserve and is considering retirement. Now, with yet another big name going down for the season, do we really think an 18 game season is a good idea?

This is the video of Viking E.J. Henderson breaking his leg. Trust me; it’s not for the feint of heart. Here’s hoping E.J. recovers well and is able to come back next season.

In The Merry Old Land Of Oz

This segment leaves us this week. The regular season of my league completed, and I did not make the playoffs. I should have, based on accumulated points since I tied by record with a cat who made the playoffs. But alas, what the league rules say and how the application actually works are two different things apparently.

But I had fun, learned a few things, got too worked up about individual performance and completely nerded out on football. All in all, an excellent waste of time. I will do it one more season at least, since I’d like to try the draft. So we’ll come back to this next year and see if lessons learned can mean a championship.

Until then, fantasy nerds rejoice, fantasy baseball is right around the corner. Let me know how it turns out.

Upon Further Review

This week we’re going to something completely different and step outside the world of professional football. I know, I should have warned you to sit down first. But something has been on my mind lately and I feel compelled to share.

What’s on my mind is Tiger Woods and his amazing time management and organizational skills. With the seemingly endless revelations regarding Tiger’s private life and his “transgressions”, the astounding points of his ability to keep the various aspects of his life in order have been lost on almost everyone.

Now, I’m not going to sit here and condemn Tiger for what he’s done. As far as I’m concerned, his extramarital activity is between him and Elin. And obviously they’re having their own troubles working through that. I’ve said often that what happens between two people in a relationship is between those two people and not the business of anyone else. If those two people care to share it with others, that’s their choice. Otherwise we should keep our noses out of their troubles.

Right now, this ever expanding state of affairs, no pun intended, is their business not ours. And I say this despite what TMZ or E! News might tell you. We tend to spend too much time focusing on the lives of the rich and famous instead of putting that time and energy into our own lives. That, however, is a discussion for another day and another forum, specifically Quick Thoughts and Nonsense, check it out.

Back to my point; with each new chippie that comes out of the woodwork looking for her 15 minutes of fame by acknowledging she knocked boots with Tiger, I become more amazed with the man. Not because he racked up a giant tally of chicks, but because he was able to.

Think about it for a minute. Tiger has a wife and a family. He has a full time job as a professional golfer that also takes up a multitude of time, both in actual on the job performance as well as travel and practice time. He has a side business where he designs golf courses. On top of that, he works for a myriad of corporations as a spokesman, which requires a significant time commitment. How did he find the time to have a harem of nookie on the side?

Yes, we could easily sit in moral judgment of Tiger regarding his “transgressions”. But what we should be doing is sitting in awe of his time management skills. How he managed to fit all of this into his life I’ll never know. I have enough trouble holding down a full time job, a wife and two dogs and fitting into that hobbies and chores to make my own world go around.

Once everything dies down and Tiger pulls his life back together, he’ll never have to worry about money again. He’s found a second career for when his golf game leaves him. He could easily go on the road speaking to corporations and businesses regarding time management and organizational skills. Honestly. If he can keep track of all of that, keep it in order and find time to address everything and keep everyone relatively happy whilst maintaining his well crafted public persona and shrouding his extracurricular activities from everyone, well the man should be teaching the rest of us how to maximize our time and keep our lives in order. And for the p-hounds out there, he can teach them how to get more tail for less.

He Said He Said

“We didn’t make a play to win that football game, defensively.” – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin

In which game?

"I'd have to cut him before he cost me my job.''- Analyst Tony Dungy, on what he'd do if he were the coach of Redskins kicker Shaun Suisham

I don’t believe that at all, especially from a man who stuck by Mike Vanderjagt.

"The commissioner has talked about the risk the owners take. We're not financially invested in ownership, so we don't face that, but we're physically invested in this. What's the price tag for that? Ask [permanently injured Buffalo tight end] Kevin Everett the price tag. We feel we take great risk every time we take the field. I'm sure the owners feel they take great risk every time they invest their money. Where is the common ground? That's what we need to find.'' - New England quarterback Tom Brady, on the current collective bargaining talks between players and owners.

As much as he annoys me, Brady makes an excellent point.

"Stop [expletive] looking at that thing and get your mind right!'' – Oakland quarterback Bruce Gradkowski to left tackle Mario Henderson during the final drive at Pittsburgh

Shame he didn’t give that pep talk to the opposing defense.

"Huh? I'm just trying to win a game, man. What's coach [Jim] Mora's response to that? That's where we're at." – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin when asked about the Steelers playoff chances.

Playoffs? Don’t talk about playoffs! At the very least, Tomlin has a wicked sense of humor. I’m sure he needs it right now. I know I do

Idiot of the week

This week it’s easy. The idiot is us, Steeler nation. Specifically, the idiots are those of us who stayed up late to watch the end of the debacle that was Pittsburgh at Cleveland. Yeesh, never did sleep seem like a better option than watching football.

On Tap This Week

Each week I try, and each week I watch yet another person slip past me toward the front of the pack. I feel like Pittsburgh. Awww, too soon?

Last Week: 9-7

This Week: 0-1

Season to date: 132-59

Sunday

New Orleans (12-0) at Atlanta (6-6)

Next stop on the Saints Express, Atlanta. Please have your tickets ready for departure. Honestly, after last week in Washington, how can you pick against New Orleans?

Saints over Falcons

Seattle (5-7) at Houston (5-7)

Ugh. Which mediocre team will prevail? More importantly who will care?

Texans over Seahawks

Denver (8-4) at Indianapolis (12-0)

Yeah, I’m sorry Peyton. I didn’t mean to doubt you. I’m back in your corner, I promise. I used my MasterCard this week just as a show of faith.

Colts over Broncos

Carolina (5-7) at New England (7-5)

Ok, the Pats are not the world beaters they once were. But they can kick Carolina’s fanny.

Patriots over Panthers

Buffalo (4-8) at Kansas City (3-9)

Good gravy.

Bills over Chiefs

Detroit (2-10) at Baltimore (6-6)

Let’s let the embarrassment continue. The only way I could feel good about the Steelers is if Baltimore crapped the bed against Detroit. That is highly doubtful, though.

Ravens over Lions

Cincinnati (9-3) at Minnesota (10-2)

This is a defining game for both teams. If Cincinnati wants to be taken seriously, they need to win. If Minnesota wants to show they’re a legitimate contender and last week’s fiasco at Arizona was an anomaly, then they must crush the Bungles. And even though the real Brett Favre showed up last week, I’m going with the latter.

Vikings over Bungles

Miami (6-6) at Jacksonville (7-5)

Yeah, Miami did a good job last week. But I think its more anomaly than anything. That’s not confidence in Jacksonville, just doubt in the Dolphins.

Jaguars over Dolphins

New York Jets (6-6) at Tampa Bay (1-11)

Go Sanchize! I wish my fantasy team was still in effect. With Freeman’s new penchant for turnovers and the Jets defensive proclivity for forcing turnovers, it would be a jackpot!

Jets over Buccaneers

Green Bay (8-4) at Chicago (5-7)

I feel like some cheese.

Packers over Bears

Washington (3-9) at Oakland (4-8)

Who’s the bigger crap fest? I’m going with the team that took New Orleans to the limit, not the one that lucked out playing a paper champion.

Redskins over Raiders

St. Louis (1-11) at Tennessee (5-7)

Chris Johnson highlight film forthcoming.

Titans over Rams

San Diego (9-3) at Dallas (8-4)

Hmmm, Norv Turner or Wade Phillips? It’s like Sophie’s choice, except you cannot give up both.

Chargers over Cowboys

Philadelphia (8-4) at New York Giants (7-5)

With a fat new contract to match his pant size, Andy Reid will prevail. Or at the very least, grab a slice of New York style pizza. Either way, he walks away a big winner.

Eagles over Giants

Monday

Arizona (8-4) at San Francisco (5-7)

If that’s the true Arizona team I saw last week, this is a no brainer.

Cardinals over 49ers

The Crystal Ball 2009 Week 14 Thursday Night Special

Wow, Tomlin was right, the Steelers did unleash hell. Because if watching the Raiders beat Pittsburgh at home isn’t hell, I don’t know what is.

Let’s face facts. This team currently is mediocre at best. At worst, we’re looking at a bad team and a mere shell of the unit that won the Super Bowl. Does it have the capacity of being a high caliber team? Absolutely. But will it? Who knows?

I’m resisting the urge to go on a screed about the team, we’re not quite there. Oh, we’re close, but not there yet.

I don’t understand how a team that can defeat the Vikings, a good team, can lose 4 straight with two against abysmal AFC west teams. I just do not. I don’t know where their mojo went, but someone find it and fast.

As for the Oakland game, there’s not much to say. Look, the offense screwed up more than once. Three trips into the red zone that resulted in a field goal, a failed 4^th down conversion and a turnover do not spell world beaters. But at least in crunch time they stepped up. The same cannot be said for the defense.

This game falls squarely on the defense. The defense consistently gave up big play after big play, to a career backup quarterback at home.

They cannot stop big plays, nor can they seem to force turnovers without Troy. The only thing they can do with any semblance of success is prevent opposing running backs from reaching 100 yards of rushing. But any more, I think teams are eschewing the rush to go after Pittsburgh’s exposed secondary. And so far, that has yielded big results for the opposition.

So what is the problem? Why is a unit that looked so dominating last year now at best the middle of the NFL pack? Well it’s like a king size bed with queen size blankets; there are not enough covers to go around.

Troy is out, so they have to cover for him. Aaron Smith goes out so those remaining must cover for him. Larry Foote and Bryant McFadden left, but instead of their replacements taking over, those remaining must cover for the sub par players in their spots. This is especially true in the secondary, where William Gay has proven to be far more ineffectual than advertised.

I said previously that at least this season the Super Bowl defense is going better than in 2006. Now, I wonder. It would seem that the team is getting caught up in a cycle of mediocrity that is self perpetuating. Of course, having Big Ben and Hines having a war of words in the press and Troy questionable for the remainder of the season doesn’t help either.

Maybe I must think 2006, when I went back and watched the Super Bowl XL highlight DVD and it made me feel better. Hey, it’s already like 2006, complete with a crappy loss to the Raiders.

On Tap Tonight

Pittsburgh (6-6) at Cleveland (1-11)

"Hines will do what's best for Hines, I'm sure." – Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger

Hines Ward has a strained hamstring, is listed as questionable and said he will try to play tonight, but it’s doubtful he will. Yes, taste the irony of Hines’ becoming injured a week after questioning Ben’s toughness for not playing. They stated they kissed and made up. But I think Ben’s thinly veiled dig, said earlier in the week, kind of tells everyone that things are still a bit frosty between the two.

Well, playing in Cleveland tonight will not help, with game time temperatures in the low teens and wind chill making it terribly colder. This will be a game of attrition, and one with the season on the line. That flicker of hope I have is as small as my confidence. But hey, as long as it’s still there, we forge ahead….

Steelers over Browns