The Crystal Ball 2007 Week 16

Crestfallen. Devastated. Crushed. Demoralized. Destroyed. Emotionally spent. A magical hold on something special so close, and gone in an instant. They only had to hold on a little longer, but no, that was not possible. In the end, the pressure became too great, and no longer could they sustain the momentum which they had built.

The Dolphins bid at the imperfect season came to a screeching halt under the warm Florida sun Sunday afternoon, after beating the reeling Ravens in over time. They were so close to having it all, and now they have nothing. They should have taken notes from last year’s Raiders. You go from something colossally special, if infamous, to just another crappy also ran team. You ruined your season Miami. I hope you’re happy.


Recap

Ho hum, another week, another all time NFL record for Brett Favre; this time he captured the all time yardage record. And yes, it was another one previously held by Dan Marino. Boy, Dan-o is just having a tough year, what with Brett taking all his records, the Dolphins sucking and the Pats threatening the Dolphins place in NFL history. Calgon, take Dan away!

Kellen Clemmons got walloped and knocked out of the game by the Patriots at the very beginning of the contest.

Amazingly enough, the Buccaneers had a franchise first Sunday, recording their very first kick return for a touchdown. The historic run was set by Michael Spurlock, Morgan’s long lost cousin.

And did they ever put the boots to the Falcons in the process.

Brian Westbrook kneeling down at the one yard line was perhaps the most brilliant play, and definitely the most intelligent, of the 2007 NFL season. I’ve had people ask why it was so great, since if he scored the Eagles would have had an 11 point lead, requiring the Cowboys to pull out two scores in two minutes with no timeouts. Here’s why. It took away any possibility of a Cowboy comeback. Let’s say Westbrook scored, and the Cowboys got the ball back. Well, what happens if they run the kickoff back for a touchdown, or throw a bomb to Owens on the first play? Suddenly, the game is within one score with plenty of time left. Then what happens if the Cowboys recover the onside kick, which they would most likely attempt? Westbrook took all possible opportunities for a Cowboys comeback and sat on them at the one yard line. Find me a smarter play this season; I’d like to see it.

Brian Moorman of the Bills has a pretty smart play himself, kicking the bad snap on a punt attempt out of the end zone for a safety. Sure, it cost the Bills 2 points, but it could have cost the team 7. It kept the game close and gave Buffalo at least a fighting chance, if the weather did not.

Speaking of which, how much fun was the Browns/Bills tilt? The two teams bounced around in the snow for three hours like big kids. Ok, big kids who make millions of dollars.

The Giants late season collapse predictably continues as they lost Jeremy Shockey for the season with a broken ankle.

I figured the Redskins would not have enough juice left for the remainder of the season. I’m still not sure if they do, but they had enough left for Eli and company.

Sure was nice to see Vince Young show up for a game. At least the Vince everyone’s been hoping for in Tennessee.

Ladies and gentlemen, Shaun Hill.

The Bungles cannot stop a third string quarterback now? Boy they suck.

I had no problem with Mike Nolan going for it on 4th and 2 deep in Bengal territory late in the game. Your season is a wash; you might as well play all out for whatever win you can get. Most people had a fit about it, especially the announcers, and would have lambasted Nolan if the 49ers had lost. I’m sorry; I’d rather have a coach that goes for the win instead of being scared to try and playing try not to lose. I bet the good people of Baltimore would agree with me right now. That being said, I did have a problem with the play call. How about a play action or delayed draw, something that put the ball in Frank Gore’s hands? He had been having his way with the Bungle defense all night, why not trust him again instead of your journeyman third string quarterback? That part I did not understand at all.


Jaguars 29 – Steelers 22

"We missed him a few times. It concerns me that we lost for the second week in a row. All the other stuff is irrelevant. We didn't play to win. We win today; we don't worry about whether or not we got a sack. We focus on what matters and that is winning football games." – Mike Tomlin

"We left the defense hanging the whole time. We can't leave them out there for nine minutes and then 11 minutes. We didn't play as a team." – Alan Faneca

“It’s tough, man. You have to find ways to win the game, that's all there is. The fans are angry, they've got that right. We played like crap. This isn't like it's Week 8; it's Week 14. We have to buckle down and get this thing straightened out." – Willie Parker

"Offensively, we have to block people better. We have to finish our plays better. We have to protect our passer. Receivers have to get open. The quarterback has to get rid of the ball. We have to catch the ball if we have an opportunity to do that." – Mike Tomlin

Didn’t I say that not too long ago, almost verbatim? Come on coach, if I can see it, then you should have fixed it.

Why must the offense get off to such a slow start every week? Why cannot we come out thundering like certain other teams?

Again the offensive line gave up multiple sacks, this time surrendering five of them. I see some major overhauling of the offensive line in the future. And it needs it.

Marvel Smith, through whom 4 of the 5 sacks of Roethlisberger were allowed, left game in the fourth quarter with a recurring back problem. If we are to make any kind of playoff push, we need him healthy. This is a bad development.

Parker had another 100 yard game and for second week in a row it was wasted in a losing effort.

The defense gave up an atrocious 421 yards of offense to the Jags, including another 100 yard rusher this season as Fred Taylor tore through the defense early and often for a whopping 147 yards. That’s two 100 yard rushing performances in five games, if anyone’s counting. And I am.

And for the second game in a row the defense had zero sacks. Oh boy are we missing Aaron Smith.

Also for the second game in a row Anthony Smith was burned for yet another touchdown, although he did partially made up for this one with a pick that jump started the potential comeback. Smith has talent, no doubt, but he needs to play with his head more.

Hines Ward and Heath Miller dropping passes? What is wrong with the world?

Question, was anyone else really uncomfortable when Dierdorf kept calling Roethlisberger a big strong stud? I know I was.

All the credit goes to the Jaguars for this one, and especially their offensive line. They dictated the game, controlled the clock, and wore down the defense over 60 minutes of football. They kept Taylor running and Garrard upright to convert about 10,000 third and fourth down opportunities in the second half, and were the lynchpin of the 20 play, 9:40 minute 74 yard drive that started the second half. Their work made it almost impossible for the Steelers to get pressure on Garrard or stop the Jag offense on third and fourth down conversion opportunities. Just a stupendous job by a solid unit and I tip my hat to them.

That being said, I have to bring up the consistency factor with officials calling penalties again. At least twice I saw Roethlisberger being driven into the turf well after the pass had been thrown. But Haggans brushes Garrard’s legs, and suddenly we have a 15 yard penalty for roughing the passer. If you are going to call incidental contact a personal foul because it is near the quarterback’s legs, then be consistent and call the purposeful contact meant to injure a personal foul as well. Otherwise, let it all go. Come on Goodell, get on this. You have time; obviously you are not working on Super Bust plans.

There were a few good things that occurred in the game.

Ben got super creative avoiding another sack, and shoveled the ball to Parker for a huge gain. The offense did try anything to win, I’ll give them that.

Jeff Reed now holds third place on the all time Steelers scoring list, moving past Franco Harris. That’s getting the job done.

Heath Miller set a career high with his seventh touchdown reception this season.

Ben Roethlisberger broke Terry Bradshaw’s single season touchdown record.

"It's a great honor. Unfortunately, it came in a loss and that's probably what will weigh on my mind more than anything." Ben Roethlisberger on breaking Bradshaw’s record.


What I Liked from Pittsburgh – The offense finally waking up and staging a furious rally. Bens block for Wilson’s conversion throw, Parker tearing it up. Smith’s fighting pain to keep things alive.

What I Did Not Like from Pittsburgh – The defense looking less than pedestrian for the second week in a row, said defense getting eviscerated on the ground, a 2 game losing streak, being tied with Cleveland in the division. Fans booing the team and leaving early. Come on people, who are we Raider fans? Show some pride!


NFL, the alternative Universe

Atlanta players Roddy White, Alge Crumpler, DeAngelo Hall and Chris Houston were fined $10,000 and Joe Horn was fined $7,500 for their moronic Free Mike Vick display on Monday Night Football. Hey guys the man is being punished for breaking the law. There really is no debate here. He’s not being persecuted unjustly or treated unfairly. He broke the law and now he’s serving his punishment. Perhaps you should concentrate on trying to win a game instead of public opinion, which you’ve lost as well. Wait a minute, maybe they are. Maybe this is a desperate plea to upgrade the Atlanta quarterback position. Ok, that I can understand, since I’ve seen the stellar performances of Leftwich, Harrington and Redman in action this season.

The NFL suspended Cowboy Roy Williams for Saturday’s game for excessive use of the outlawed horse collar tackle. Considering they put the rule in place because of him, you’d think he’d learn and realize they would be watching him extra close.

Terrell Owens feels that Jessica Simpson should no longer attend Cowboy games. He feels her presence is too much of a distraction for Tony Romo. Hee hee, that’s funny, Owens schooling others about distractions to the team. You think he ever listens to the words that tumble out of his mouth?


Steelers Around the World

During this holiday season, people travel far and wide to spend moments of joy and celebration with loved ones. Families spread apart by distance and time reunite for traditional meals, gift exchanges and warm embraces.

This Steeler team has traveled far and wide this season as well, trotting around the globe to play in some of the most amazing placed on Earth. But this week, they all travel home. There will be no game this week, as players and personnel reunite with family and friends for joyous celebrations.

I encourage those who are able to do the same. Gather with family and friends, toast the season, each other and that you are able to spend this time with those close to you. Over indulge at the dinner table, play games with the younger folks. Laugh, joke, tell stories and have a happy holiday one and all


It’s All In The Name

This week the NFL announced the players who were selected to this year’s Pro Bowl. Hearty congratulations go out to Steelers who were named starters James Harrison and Alan Faneca as well as Steelers named as backups Troy Polamalu, Willie Parker and Ben Roethlisberger. Ben sure knows how to celebrate such an honor, stating he’s taking his offensive line and their families with him to Hawaii, all on his dime. That’s a much better gift than some Isotoners. Take a note there Marino.

But the Pro Bowl gave me an idea. Why not make a different list of players? Each week I watch games and see players out there with some great names. Some sound so commanding, some are completely original, some seem to fit the player their position and playing style to a tee and some just make me smile. How about we make an All Star team of players with the best names in the NFL? A bit of research later, and BOOM, here we are.

Now a few ground rules first. I aimed mostly at surnames you do not hear often, so Smith, Jones and Moss, which is unique but far more common than one would think, obviously do not make the cut. And yes, there are several gentlemen in the NFL with the surname Gay, and no, they did not make the cut. Too much opportunity for someone to think a derogatory joke is being made, and that will not happen here.

I also tried to avoid well known players. Obviously LaDainian Tomlinson is a unique name, but everyone knows him now. Many of these gentlemen are unsung, backups or reserves. Not that everyone here is, as the well known and well lauded Jeff Saturday did make the list as did a few other well known players. But I tried to focus more on names that one does not usually see in the Monday game recap. I just wanted to point out some of the more original and unusual names of gentlemen in the NFL.

Mind you, I am not making fun of anyone here. Nor am I targeting any ethnic names. This little exercise is not meant to be mean or to tease, certainly not. There are just some very unique, original and fantastic names out there, and I wanted to shed some light on them, especially since a few you do not hear often enough. And this is by far a complete list, as there are many other great names out there, but I tried to make it as comprehensive as possible. So without further ado, we present the Crystal Ball 2007 Best Names All Star teams.

AFC Best Names Team

Defensive tackles
Tank Tyler - Chiefs
Elvis Dumervil – Broncos
Quinn Pitcock - Colts
Chase Page – Dolphins

Defensive Ends
Turk McBride – Chiefs
Travis Laboy – Titans
Frostee Rucker – Bengals
Brett Keisel – Steelers

Linebackers
Napoleon Harris – Chiefs
Clint Session – Colts
Pierre Woods – Patriots
Coy Wire – Bills

Cornerbacks
Quentin Jammer – Chargers
Cortland Finnegan – Titans
Blue Adams – Bengals
Ashton Youboty – Bills

Safeties
Stuart Schweigart – Raiders
Gerald Sensabaugh – Jaguars
Jamaal Fudge – Jaguars
Brodney Pool – Browns

Quarterbacks
Sage Rosenfels – Texans
Cleo Lemon – Dolphins

Running Back/Fullback
Jackie Battle – Chiefs
DeDe Dorsey – Bengals
Boomer Grigsby – Chiefs
Jameel Cook – Texans

Tight Ends
Chad Mustard – Broncos
Justin Snow – Colts

Receivers
Tab Perry – Bengals
Devard Darling – Ravens
Bam Childress – Patriots
Roscoe Parrish – Bills

Offensive Tackles
Daniel Loper – Titans
Tony Ugoh – Colts
Cory Lekkerkerker – Dolphins
Jacob Bender – Jets

Offensive Guards
Logan Mankins – Patriots
Nate Livings – Bengals
Ben Grubbs – Ravens
Marquay Love – Dolphins

Centers
Jeff Saturday – Colts
Nick Mangold – Jets
Rex Hadnot – Dolphins

Special Teams
LaBrandon Toefield - Jaguars
Daniel Sepulveda – Steelers
Chris Hanson – Patriots


NFC Best Names Team

Defensive Tackles
Marcus Tubbs - Seahawks
Johnny Jolly – Packers
Justin Tuck – Giants
Tank Johnson – Cowboys

Defensive Ends
C.J. Ah You – Rams
Julius Peppers – Panthers
Otis Grigsby – Panthers
Alex Buzbee – Redskins

Linebackers
Will Herring – Seahawks
Anthony Cannon- Lions
H.B. Blades – Redskins
Kyle Shotwell – Eagles

Cornerbacks
Chris Gamble – Panthers
David Irons – Falcons
Fred Smoot – Redskins
Geoffrey Pope – Giants

Safeties
Boone Stutz – Seahawks
Quinton Teal – Panthers
Charlie Peprah – Packers
Greg Blue – Lions

Quarterback
Brock Berlin – Rams
Brooks Bollinger – Vikings

Running back/Fullback
Frank Gore – 49ers
Rock Cartwright – Redskins
B.J. Askew – Buccaneers
Madison Hedgecock – Giants

Tight End
Dominique Byrd – Rams
Alge Crumpler – Falcons

Receivers
Logan Payne – Seahawks
Dane Looker – Rams
Hank Baskett – Eagles
Isaiah Stanback – Cowboys

Offensive Tackles
Jeremy Trueblood – Buccaneers
Jon Stinchcomb – Saints
Winston Justice – Eagles
Doug Free – Cowboys

Offensive Guards
Mansfield Wrotto – Seahawks
Justin Smiley – 49ers
Richie Incognito – Rams
Guy Whimper – Giants

Centers
Geoff Hangartner - Panthers
Jason Spitz – Packers
Kurt Quarterman – Falcons

Special Teams
Ryan Plackemeier – Seahawks
Derrick Frost – Redskins
R.W. McQuarters – Giants


Idiot of the week

Ladies and gentlemen, this week we have a very special winner of this illustrious award. One gentleman stood up amongst the crowd of idiots and proclaimed himself the top dog of stupidity. I am speaking, of course, of Jacksonville sports radio host Mike Dempsey. Mr. Dempsey, who can be heard on station 1010 XL, got a little overzealous in his joy of the Jaguars victory on Sunday. In his ecstasy, Mr. Dempsey proclaimed that the worldwide fan base known as Steeler Nation was nothing more than a myth.

Look, I can understand getting overly exuberant in victory. The Steelers played terribly and Jacksonville had dominating win on the road against Pittsburgh. And I can understand wanting to tout your teams accomplishments. I think myself I have mentioned the fact that Pittsburgh has won five Super Bowls about 9,876,543,010 times since February of 2006. But to say that Steeler Nation is a myth? That’s just plain absurdity.

So, to help out Mr. Dempsey, let’s do a small breakdown detailing some of the more relevant highlights regarding Steeler Nation, Steelers fans and Jaguars fans. Tell me if these items are myth or fact Mike.


Pittsburgh has sold out every game since 1972.

Jacksonville covers 10,000 seats in Alltel stadium for every home game to avoid blackouts in the local market.

An estimated 30,000 Steelers fans took over Alltel Stadium two years ago for a Sunday night game in Jacksonville.

On the "Mike and Mike in the morning" radio program on ESPN recently, the Steelers were ranked as the #1 out of market draw.

After Super Bowl XL, it was calculated by NFLshop.com that 40% of all merchandise sold for the season was Steeler related.

During road games, you can regularly hear the chant “here we go Steelers here we go” echoing through the home teams stadium.

During night games in San Diego in 2005 and 2006, both of which I attended, John Madden could not get over the overwhelming presence of Steeler fans, repeatedly mentioning how many Steeler faithful were in attendance. And you could hear the above mentioned Steeler chant during those broadcasts, both nationally televised.

During pregame of the 2006 Charger game, Steeler fans BOOED the Charger team when they came out for warm-ups, drowning out the home fans cheers.

A Steeler fan can regularly check http://www.steelernation.com/ for Steeler news, information and general camaraderie amongst other fans. www.jaguarnation.com does not exist.

In victory or defeat, most diehard fans stay to the final tick. While some last week left early due to being overwrought by the cold temperatures in the 20s and the pain of watching their team lose, when the Steelers came back to tie the game, the stadium was still rocking at military after burner decibel levels.

Steeler fan clubs and bars exist in major cities across the country and fans live and cheer the Steelers in every state in the US. Fan sites and message boards have fans represented from nations spanning the globe.

The crowd for the victory parade in downtown Pittsburgh after Super Bowl XL was estimated at 250,000 on a snowy, cold February morning.

How many showed up for the Jaguars last Super Bowl parade? Oh wait, that’s right that never happened.

Super Bowl XXXIX, hosted by Jacksonville, is widely regarded as one of the worst Super Bowls and host cities since the inception of the game.


Well Mike, are those things myth or fact? I’ll give you a hint, the answer starts with an F, not an M.

Mike, nobody cares for a sore winner. If you are unsure of this, please note that everybody right now hates the Patriots, the current kings of sore winners. Look, I can understand the joy of beating a great team like Pittsburgh in their own stadium, especially since you are the only team to accomplish this feat all season. But you went too far. You called out the wrong fan base. I could understand doing this regarding some other crappy team, like say the Raider Nation, but not Pittsburgh fans. We bleed the black and gold. We live and die by what happens on Sunday afternoons. The city rocks from Sunday to Saturday, even if no game is played in town that week. Heck the city rocks from Sunday to Saturday every week of the year. When, exactly, does Jacksonville rock?

But I will extend congratulations to the Jaguars on their victory. We as members of Steelers Nation can at least be gracious losers, no matter how much it pains us to drop a game. I understand the joy of victory. But remember, there is a good chance we could be facing off again come January. And you just awoke a sleeping giant. I’m sure if things turn out differently, all 20 of your fans will be quite upset.

You can call Steeler fans lots of things. Obsessive, crazy, highly intelligent, dedicated, everywhere, great looking devoted, possessing of great taste, loyal, well dressed. But fair weather, I’m afraid not.

For this, Mike, you are honored as our Idiot of the Week. Heck, you just made top three for Idiot of the Year.


On Tap This Week

It would seem Pittsburgh is not the only one with some late season stumbling going on.

Last week 9-7
Season to date 147-77

No worries, though. With each new week come new opportunities. Onward ho!


Thursday

Pittsburgh (9-5) at St. Louis (3-11)

Did you know the Pittsburgh has never beaten the Rams on the road? It never happened in Cleveland or in Los Angeles, unless you count Super Bowl XIV. As a matter of fact, the last time Pittsburgh played the Rams away, it was in Los Angeles and during the rookie year of a certain extra large running back who would gain much acclaim with the away team that lost that day. I think it’s high time this little streak gets put to bed once and for all. Hey guys, if you need motivation, think of this. Everyone is saying Stephen Jackson is going to eat you alive and picking the Rams to win. Is that how you want this season remembered?

Steelers over Rams


Saturday

Dallas (12-2) at Carolina (6-8)

So the Boys will be without Roy Williams for the game. Not that it’ll matter, the Cowboys will be fine. Jessica will stay away this week, per T.O’.s request.

Cowboys over Panthers


Sunday

New York Giants (9-5) at Buffalo (7-7)

You know what? Buffalo can beat the Giants. I know they can. You know what else? Kevin Everett is scheduled to be in Orchard Park for the game. Now tell me how much of a chance the G-men really have?

Bills over Giants


Green Bay (12-2) at Chicago (5-9)

PACKERS!!! I told you last week Lovie waited too long to call upon the magic of Kyle Orton. It’s too late, and I really hate to say that.

Packers over Bears


Cleveland (9-5) at Cincinnati (5-9)

Oh, I know who the better team is here. And I know who I’d like to win. Shame they are not one in the same. Stupid Bungles.

Browns over Bengals


Kansas City (4-10) at Detroit (6-8)

Ugh.

Lions over Chiefs


Houston (7-7) at Indianapolis (12-2)

Unless Jim Sorgi time starts midway through the first quarter, I think Dungy and crew will be just fine.

Colts over Texans


Miami (1-13) at New England (14-0)

Miami, what were you thinking? You needed to save that win last week for this week! If you held off one more week, this would have made your season all worthwhile. Gaining your first win, delivering to New England their first loss, defending the honor of the 72 team in one fell swoop would have made you heroes. Alas, that is not to be. However, if the Dolphins should win, I vow to purchase a Dolphins Joey Porter Jersey from NFLshop.com.

Patriots over Dolphins


Philadelphia (6-8) at New Orleans (7-7)

You got me. When do you trust Philly, and when do you not? They had a huge upset win last week, but which team will show up this week? Yeah, I’m going home team, this looks like a great big letdown from Philadelphia.

Saints over Eagles


Oakland (4-10) at Jacksonville (10-4)

And you thought Fred Taylor ran all over Pittsburgh. That was nothing. Watch this week.

Jaguars over Raiders


Atlanta (3-11) at Arizona (6-8)

I would feel bad for Atlanta, but they just do not seem to invoke sympathy. Must be those crappy looking uniforms.

Cardinals over Falcons


New York Jets (3-11) at Tennessee (8-6)

I’d like Tennessee to lose, it helps my playoff hopes. Something tells me, though, that is not going to happen. Probably my eyeballs and common sense.

Titans over Jets


Baltimore (4-10) at Seattle (9-5)

Well, can you really trust a Baltimore team that loses, in overtime, to the Dolphins? Can you really trust Billick who has no guts to go for the win in regulation from the one yard line? I cannot trust him to tie his shoes properly.

Seahawks over Ravens


Tampa Bay (9-5) at San Francisco (4-10)

Ok, it’s on the road and San Fran won last week, but I’m still going with Tampa Bay. They’re much better than the Bungles.

Buccaneers over 49ers


Washington (7-7) at Minnesota (8-6)

Like I said, the Redskins had more left in the tank than I thought. But the Vikings are coming on strong. As long as they do not have that pesky turnover problem that cropped up last week, they’ll have no problem.

Vikings over Redskins


Monday

Denver (6-8) at San Diego (9-5)

I care not if there is nothing left to play for by either team, I will not trust Denver for another game this year. Not even if Norv Turner is involved. Sorry Denver fans your Christmas Eve gets spoiled. My recommendation, watch 24 hours of A Christmas Story instead.

Chargers over Broncos



To one and all, Happy Hanukah, Merry Christmas and Happy Kwanzaa! Drink eggnog, eat tasty holiday treats until your stuffed, and I hope you find everything you always wanted wrapped up in a nice bow!